Where to Start?
If you know of someone who has sexually offended or are a caregiver to a young person who has sexualized behaviours or has sexually offended, this page may be helpful to develop an understanding of the treatment process.
What is the process of treatment?
This is not for legal advise or information about the criminal justice system or process.
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Some of the things we focus on in treatment include:
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Honesty
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Making sense of the why
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Understanding consent, sexual offenses, legal implications
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The Offending Cycle; the behaviours, thoughts, & feelings
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Warning signs & triggers for reoffending
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Identify thought patterns / ways we tell ourselves its okay to to hurt someone sexually
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Identify & create outside / inside blocks to help you stop the offense cycle
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Identify the why- why we don't want to offend (positives in our life)
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Identify & further develop strengths, support system, & empathy
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Developing assertiveness & problem solving skills
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** We also take into account addiction, neurodiversity, trauma, grief, etc... **
Definitions for those 10yrs + Words to Know
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Accountable: To take responsibility for your behaviour.
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Anger: When you feel really mad and don’t like what happened.
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Assertive: Standing up for yourself and saying what you want without hurting others.
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Bestiality: Doing sexual things with animals.
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Bribe: Making promises to trade one thing for another thing you want. An example would be giving your little sister or brother candy so she won’t tell on you.
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Child Sexual Abuse: An older person doing sexual things with someone not old enough to say it is okay.
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Coercion: To make someone do things, or let you do things to them that they don’t want to.
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Confused: To not understand or to feel mixed up.
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Conscience: A voice inside you that tells you right from wrong, and how to make good choices.
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Consent: Permission.
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Consequences: The results of your behaviour.
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Deny: To say something didn’t happen when you know it did.
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Empathy: To understand and care about the thoughts and feelings of someone else.
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Fantasy: Thoughts about being sexual, like a daydream.
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Feeling: An emotion that happens from the neck down; like sad, mad, worried, or happy
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Fondle: To touch someone’s private parts without their permission. This is a sexual offense.
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Force: Physically make other do things they do not want to do.
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Frottage: To rub your hands or private parts against someone without permission. This is a sexual offense.
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Frustration: To feel like nothing is going right.
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Groom: To set others up so you can sexually offend them.
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Honesty: Truth; the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
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Hopeless: Feeling like everything is bad or wrong and nothing or no one can make it better.
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Illegal: Something that is not allowed by law.
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Inside Blocks: Walls that you make up in your heart and head that remind you to make good choices, like to not sexually offend.
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Intimidate: Saying or doing things to scare others.
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Jealous: To want something that someone else has, like a new toy or your mom or dads attention.
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Legal: Something that is allowed by law.
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Legal Age of Consent: The age it is legal to give permission to do something sexually.
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Manipulate: Tricking others into doing things you want them to do.
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Masturbate: To touch your own private parts.
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Minimize: To make something sound not important.
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Outside Block: Walls that you place outside of you to stop you from sexually offending, like making sure your not around little kids.
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Personal Space: The amount of space that people need around them to feel comfortable
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Positive Attention: Attention you get for doing good things.
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Private Parts: The parts of your body that are covered by a swimsuit.
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Problem Solving: Working things out when there is a problem.
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Rape: Using coercion or force to make someone have sex. This is a sexual offense.
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Rationalize: To make up reasons for what you did to take the blame off of you.
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Respect: To think and care about how others feel.
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Responsible: Taking credit or blame for your thoughts and behaviours.
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Revenge: To hurt or “get back” at someone for something they did to you.
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Sadness: To be unhappy.
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Sexual Abuse: Sexual behaviour that harms another or is illegal, like having sex without consent.
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Sexual Arousal: Exciting or tingling urges in your private parts that sometimes happen with sexual thoughts.
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Sexual Offense: A sexual action that hurts another person and is against the law.
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Sexual Offense Cycle: The steps of thoughts, feelings, and behaviours leading up to doing a sexual offense.
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Sexual Touching Problem: A problem kids have who want to touch or hurt other sexually or do sexual things with others without their permission.
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Sexuality: All the things that have to do with having sexual parts, being a sexual person, and being sexual with others.
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Sexually Transmitted Diseases: Illnesses you can get when you do sexual things with people who already have these.
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Support System: The group of people who help you with your problems.
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Therapist: A trained person to help you with your problems.
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Thinking Problems: Thoughts that make it easier to sexually offend. Some examples of thinking problems are: minimizing, denying, or rationalizing.
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Thought: Something that happens from your neck up. The thing that you say to yourself on your mind or head.
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Threat: Telling others bad things will happen if they do not do what you want.
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Trigger: Something that makes it easier for a kid to start thinking or feeling like hurting someone sexually.
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Trust: When you feel safe around someone.
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Victim: Someone who is hurt by others.
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Voyeurism: Being sneaky and watching others be naked or have sex without their consent, this is a sexual offense.
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Warning Signs: The things we teach ourselves about how to tell when our sexual offense cycle is about to happen.